The Goodnight Kiss
by Alphabet54
Summary: The Marauder era. Sirius and Remus are finding out how they feel about eachother.


_Author's note: This is my first Harry Potter fanfic so be kind. That said all CCs are appreciated as I know I have a lot to improve on. I would especially appreciate any advice on how to write a realistic kissing scene._

****

**The Goodnight Kiss **

They were sitting on the bed, with faces slightly too close to be comfortable. Remus was trembling but Sirius was completely still. _This can't be happening, _Remus thought, _Sirius likes girls. _But somehow Remus couldn't stop himself from moving closer to Sirius. Heads almost touching now Remus could've counted Sirius' individual eyelashes if he hadn't been so transfixed by those unreadable black eyes, staring at him.

_Hell, _thought Remus disgustedly, _there's no turning back now_ and slowly, carefully, he brought his lips to Sirius'. He kissed him lightly, gently, feeling the contours of Sirius perfect lips, scared that any sudden movement would break the spell.

They stayed still, held in that moment and then Remus felt Sirius tentatively kiss him back, ever so softly. Remus brought his hand to Sirius' face, tenderly stroking his jet-black hair in the way his hands had been aching to do ever since their fourth year. He heard a sigh of pleasure escape from Sirius and encouraged, Remus delicately tried to use his tongue to part Sirius' lips.

But the fantasy shattered.

'Moony, what the fuck are you doing?' Sirius growled, sharply pulling back and looking at his friend in shock.

Remus feeling as though the air had just been punched out of him couldn't answer, couldn't even think. 'I…'

Sirius was trembling and breathing hard. Needing to lash out at something he pointlessly grabbed one of the multitudes of books that lay on Remus' bed and hurled it at the door. The book made a sickening crunch as it slammed against the wood, the spine of the book collapsed leaving it lying broken on the floor. Silence settled on the room and too shocked to move they were in stalemate, still sitting so closely together that Remus could feel Sirius' heavy breathing on his cheek.

After what seemed like an endless time of waiting for the other to speak, Sirius got up quickly.

'Padfoot..' Remus grabbed Sirius' hand trying to make him stay.

'Don't,' Sirius warned his shaking voice dangerously low. Remus slowly let go and watched Sirius leave, wincing as the door slammed in his wake.

Remus stared at the door not able to comprehend what had happened. He half expected Sirius to return swearing and yelling, but after ten minutes of silence he knew that Sirius wasn't coming back. Remus got up slowly and walked to the window, pressing his hot, flushed cheeks against the cool condensation on the glass, closing his eyes trying to wish it all away.

Sirius almost ran down the staircase trying to get away from that room, that bed, as fast as possible. He found the Gryffindor common room empty apart from a girl, Vanessa Lockhart sleeping on her Defence against the Dark Arts- NEWT LEVEL book. It was midnight and she had obviously been cramming. He stopped and head to one side considered her sleeping form. Vanessa Lockhart was pretty enough with her pert little face resting on the book and her blonde hair spilling over the pages. She would do he decided.

'Hey wake up.' Sirius whispered, gently shaking Vanessa's shoulders.

'Donwannagouhschool,' Vanessa mumbled into the book as she turned trying to shake Sirius off.

'Unfortunately that ship's already sailed.' Sirius informed her grinning, as she opened her eyes blearily.

Vanessa removed her head from the book with a groan.

'What ship?' she yawned, stretching to reveal a smooth, flat stomach. Yes, Sirius thought, sitting himself in a chair opposite, she would do nicely.

'Never mind,' he said smiling his most charming smile, his crocodile smile as James called it. A crocodile smile for catching little fishies.

'Moony you okay?' James said smirking slightly as entering the dormitory he was greeted by the sight of Remus looking as though he was trying to push his head through the paned glass.

'Mate, if your contemplating of jumping, you know you should probably open the window first, right?'

Remus half-heartedly tugged at the widow's handle, forced a smile on his face before turning to face his best friend. 'Damn,' he joked unconvincingly, 'my plan of self-destruction foiled by a window that can't open.'

James considered the problem for a moment, brow furrowed. 'You could take a run at it from the other side of the room,' he suggested helpfully. 'I'm sure the impact would make it break.'

_Don't tempt me_, thought Remus. Instead he merely laughed.

James noticed the strained laugh and observing the crumpled book on the floor (to Remus' relief) came to the wrong conclusion.

'Listen if you're worried about Defence against the Dark arts tomorrow, don't,' James said simply. 'You'll do fine. Hell, you even give Padfoot a run for his money in that class.' James walked across the room and threw himself down onto his bed yawning happily. 'Speaking of the idiot, where is he? I thought he said he was going to get an early night.'

'He went out,' Remus said the frozen smile still in place.

'One of his fishies?' James enquired.

Remus, wishing that James would discuss any topic other than Sirius' girlfriends, shrugged, not trusting himself to speak.

'Well he better get back soon because I have a victory to report on the Evans front.'

James smiled broadly, going over the memory in his head. 'I walked past her and said excuse me and she moved out of the way and let me pass, didn't hit me or yell at me, not even an insult my friend.'

'Great,' Remus mumbled, his mind drifting from James' Evans-babble.

'Wait, there's more!' James declared in a manner not unlike a magician announcing his next trick. 'I was so encouraged by this conversation…'

'It's not a conversation if you're the only person talking Prongs,'

'I was so encouraged by this conversation,' James went on determinedly, 'that a lesson later after gathering my courage I magnanimously offered my services as a tutor of Astronomy. She was having trouble in that class you see. And, drum roll please, guess what she said?'

'That she'd rather fail Astronomy or strip naked and have an orgy in the astronomy tower with professor Aspel and any other teacher of his choice to improve her grade than spend ten minutes studying with you.' Remus wearily guessed.

There was a pause as both Remus and James tried to shake off the sudden disturbing image of Lily in a three way with her fat astronomy teacher.

'No Moony,' James cheerfully deciding to ignore the last comment, 'her answer was only one word long.'

'No?'

'Yes,' James declared.

'Yes, she said no?'

James looked annoyed that Remus was being so slow, 'No. She. Said. Yes.' He paused between each word for emphasis. James raised his eyebrows, 'Impressive yes?'

'Yeah, she must be really desperate to pass Astronomy,' Remus muttered.

'Sorry didn't quite hear that,' James said, casually bringing his wand out from his pocket and idly twirling between his fingers.

'Yeah, she must really like you,' Remus supplied obediently.

'That's exactly the same conclusion I came too my friend.' James said smiling as he replaced his wand.

'Prongs, I do see a slight problem in your little plan of a date though.'

'My plan in flawless, but by all means Moony, try and combat my genius.' James allowed generously, leaning back on his pillows in a smug manner.

'Well, you don't take Astronomy.' Remus pointed out.

'Moony, Moony,' James said disappointedly, shaking his head. 'Do you know why you haven't got a girlfriend?'

_Because I like guys. _

'No why?' Remus asked.

'You don't see things in the same way I do.'

'James, you haven't had a girlfriend in two years, in fact you _still_ don't have a girlfriend.' Remus reminded him, slightly exasperated.

'Lets take for example my wonderful genius at setting up this date.' James continued unruffled, having taking a liking to his new policy of ignoring Remus. 'You see a tiny problem such as my knowledge of Astronomy or lack there of and you blow it out of all proportion. I on the other hand,' James said breezily, 'trust to _fate_ and see only me, my little Lily Evans and the stars.' Closing his eyes James started to hum Moon River softly to himself.

Remus, partly to stop James' toneless humming and partly because of the annoying smug smile on James' humming lips, thought that it was time for a reality check.

'Prongs how many times have you asked Lily Evan's out, excluding tonight?'

'Three hundred and fifty seven times.' James said instantly, keeping his eyes closed.

'And she's said no three hundred and fifty seven times.'

'What's your point?'

'I don't think _fate's_ on your side Prongs.'

'What do you mean?' he cried accusingly.

'Sirius we have been talking for over an hour,' Vanessa stated, looking amused, 'it is the middle of night and we have an extremely important test tomorrow. Why else would you be talking to me?'

'I am hurt that you mistrust my motives.' Sirius said, adopting a wounded manner.

'So you're saying that in the middle of the night you just woke up and thought, "hey I think I might go down to the common room and make a new friend,"'

'_Amazing_,' Sirius said flabbergasted. 'Do you know that's _exactly_ what I thought. It's like we're mentally connected somehow.' He sighed wondrously as Vanessa tried hard not to smile.

'Truth, now please.' She demanded.

'Fine,' Sirius sighed, 'but you're not going to like it. It's very ugly.'

'I think I'll manage.'

'I had a fight with Moony,' Sirius tried to keep his voice nonchalant, though the muscles in his face tightened and his eyes looked upset.

'Big fight?' Vanessa asked noticing the sudden change.

Sirius shrugged, and then seeing her concerned look made a face and laughed, quickly shaking his head into a smile.

'So,' he continued, 'I had to get out of the dormitory. I found you here and thought I'd bother you a bit. I mean,' he added grinning, 'there are worse ways to spend the night.'

'Flattering,' Vanessa commented wryly.

'What's you're excuse?' he asked.

'Studying,' Vanessa grimaced making a nasty face at her Defence against the Dark Arts book that was lying open.

'Oh,' Sirius said grinning, 'you call _sleeping _on a book studying.' Sirius quickly dodged a quickpunch.'Vanessaby yourstandards Imust be one of the hardest working students at Hogwarts then. I constantly fall asleep at my desk in class. Hey,' Sirius stopped suddenly as if struck by an epiphany, 'maybe that's why I'm so smart. The knowledge in the book diffuses itself into my head while I'm asleep.'

'You know, with all that knowledge filling your head, it's amazing how you're not all arrogant and big-headed.' Vanessa commented scathingly.

Sirius considered seriously, 'it _is_ pretty impressive actually.'

It was silent in the dormitory. James after waiting ever-so-patiently for Sirius' return after forty-five minutes had left again with the invisibility cloak to go and research NEWT level astronomy, just to make sure his flawless plan had no flaws.

Not wishing to be left alone with his thoughts Remus was therefore very glad when Peter burst into their dormitory.

'Hey mate,' Remus said, 'I haven't see you all day.'

'That's right you haven't seen me all day!' Peter yelled. 'Do you want to know why you haven't seen me all day even though we're in three of the same classes?'

Remus, wondering if all his friends were completely insane, humoured him. 'Sure.'

At Remus' calm reply Peter seemed to swell like a bull frog before bursting with, 'BECAUSE I HAVE BEEN LOCKED IN A SUPPLY CLOSET SINCE 8 O'CLOCK THIS MORNING! DO YOU KNOW WHAT TIME IT IS NOW?'

'Two in the morning,'

'YES, TWO IN THE FUCKING MORNING MOONY! SO I HAVE BEEN IN THAT STINKING CUPBOARD FOR SIXTEEN HOURS!' There was a pause as Peter made an obvious effort to calm himself.

Remus couldn't help himself. 'Actually wormatail, I think it's actually eighteen.'

'Eighteen **_what_**?' Peter asked in dangerous voice.

'Hours.' Remus informed him.

Peter threw Remus such a poisonous look that - if the world were fair - would have killed him on the spot.

'I was gone for eighteen hours and my _best friends_ didn't even notice I was gone.' Peter cried, seeming to address a third party in the room. 'That's friendship for you!'

'Sorry mate,' Remus said apologetically, though still unable to hide a slight smile.

'I mean,' Peter continued, 'didn't you notice I wasn't _there _in potions? We share a cauldron Remus!' he exclaimed exasperatedly. 'And afterwards when you were walking through the dungeons _back _past the closet _where I was trapped _didn't you notice that there was rather a lot of banging going on.'

'I did actually,' Remus defended himself, 'I thought it was Peeves playing with the water pipes.'

'THERE AREN'T ANY WATER PIPES IN THE DUNGEONS!' Peter yelled unable to contain himself any longer.

'To be honest I didn't really think aboutit,' Remus admitted

'WELL NEXT TIME MAYBE YOU SHOULD!' Peter bellowed.

'Why? Planning on going in there for some more quality time?'

Peter just scowled and started to change his clothes that smelled quite a bit after his day in captivity.

'Er…. wormatail, what were you doing in a cupboard?' Remus asked a few moments later, his curiosity getting the better of his wiser self.

'I am glad that you asked,' Peter glowered. 'I was walking to potions this morning, you know potions don't you Moony? One of the _three _classes that we _shared _today?' Peter, paused to throw another petulant look at Remus before going on with his story. 'Anyway I came across Snivellus lounging against one of the doors to a supply closet and so I naturally asked what he was doing. He said that he'd managed to lock James in the closet and that he was making sure he wouldn't get out.'

'And you actually believed him?' Remus scoffed.

Peter glared at Remus, 'Listen Moony, one more joke and that's it. _I am a man on the edge.' _

'Okay,' Remus said trying desperately to straighten his face, 'I apologise, please go on with your story.'

'Well,' Peter started. 'I was obviously concerned when I heard Prongs was in the closet. So I drew out my wand and told Snivellus to '_step aside'_ you know in that really low voice I can do.' Peter, getting into the swing of his story had actually pulled out his wand and on an encouraging nod from Remus demonstrated his really low voice, unfortunately it didn't work out so well and it shifted an octave higher on the word 'aside'. Remuslet out a strangled cry that he quickly turned into a rather unconvincing cough.

Peter with the air of a martyr ignored his friend and continued. 'Anyway, he was obviously scared as he stepped aside immediately. So I walked to the door,' at this point Peter with his wand still outstretched actually advanced towards an imaginary door in three large strides, 'and I opened it using that really difficult alohamora charm that I can do.' To Remus' delight, Peter in all seriousness turned the 'doorknob' and, as Remus was crying with silent laughter, with a sweeping hand gesture swung open the imaginary door.

Peter apparently unaware of the fact that Remus was fighting for oxygen carried on unperturbed. 'Anyway I opened the door but it was dark inside and I couldn't see Prongs. So I stepped inside to try and find him and that's when BAM! the door slammed shut behind me.'

Remus half expected Peter to act out the mime-stuck-in-a-box routine but apparently Peter was done with his stage career as he flopped down onto his bed.

'The worst of it is Moony,' Peter whined, 'that Filch and that stupid cat of his found me in the supply closet and he thought that I was trying to steal cleaning supplies. So now I've got two weeks worth of detentions after my NEWTS are over.'

Remus, feeling as though his sides we're about to break from not being able to laugh, let out a deep sigh and turned to Peter.

'Wormtail, can I give you a bit of advice?' Remus asked.

'Shoot,' said Peter, now rooting round his bed for the left over chocolate bar that he hadn't finished the night before.

'Don't _ever_ tell Padfoot and Prongs about you little closet fiasco. They would _never _let it die. If they ask, just say you spent the day in Hogsmead because you were tired of the NEWTS and that you were caught by Filch sneaking back in.'

'That's a good idea Moony, thanks.' Peter agreed, munching happily away on his half-melted bar of chocolate.

* * *

Three hours (and one trip to the kitchens for chocolate frogs) later Sirius and Vanessa were sitting cuddled on the sofa flirting shamelessly with each other. This rapid wooing of girls was nothing new for Sirius. After a Christmas party James had once drunkenly pointed out that Sirius could seduce a girl in the time it took for him to go to the toilet, and have the girl head-over-heels in love by the time he had finished washing his hands. 

After victoriously throwing the last chocolate frog wrapper onto the table in front of them Sirius' seducee made an attempt to move.

'I should go back to the dormitory.' she said regretfully, loosening Sirius' grip around her waist.

'It's because we've run out of chocolate isn't it?' Sirius said suspiciously eyeing the last empty wrapper, 'you were just using me for the food. The old 'I-fell-asleep-studying-so-would-you-be-a-dear-and-get-me-a-chocolate-frog' routine ehh?'

Vanessa who was trying to standing up, laughed, 'No, it's because we've got an important end of year exam tomorrow,' she reminded him, 'and I should…'

'Stay with me, I agree completely.' Sirius interjected, pulling her back onto the sofa with him, 'I've got lots of tricks up my sleeves that'll make you ace that exam,' Sirius tried to earnestly convince her whilst tickling her mercilessly.

'No, I've been warned about you and your tricks,' Vanessa giggled, extracting herself from Sirius' hold, 'I think it would be best if we both went to bed,' she decided.

'Together?' Sirius grinned, 'great idea. Yours or mine?'

'If you can manage Dumbledore's trick staircase be my guest.'

'Actually, I was always told a gentleman took a girl to his place.'

'Sirius,' Vanessa complained, trying to decide whether she was charmed or annoyed.

'Vanessa,' he pleaded, running his hand lightly up her arm.

'No,' she pushed his hand away, 'I'm going to go to bed now,' she decided resolutely. 'And, I'm asking you to do the same thing.'

'Well, I can't refuse a pretty girl.' Sirius admitted holding his hands up in defeat.

Vanessa blushed slightly and Sirius went in for the kill.

'Goodnight.' Vanessa said turning to leave.

Sirius quickly caught her arm and pulled her back to him. 'Goodnight kiss?' he suggested. Vanessa mock-sighed dramatically.

'Oh all right,' she agreed, 'but just a small one.'

Remus looked at his watch for what must have been the hundredth time that night. It was 4.00am.

Sirius hadn't come back yet.

James had returned a half-an-hour ago, crest-fallen in the realisation that he couldn't learn the whole NEWT Astronomy course in a weekend. But after loudly complaining that even the stars were out to get him, he was now asleep muttering about what sounded like 'Cepheid variables….noPulsars.'

Peter was also asleep and snoring loudly, completely exhausted from his traumatic day in the cupboard.

Remus, however was wide-awake, still thinking about Sirius.

_Did I do something wrong?_ He wondered, confused, the same worries circling round in his head. A_m I such a bad kisser that I scared him away for good?_

Remus, remembering the kiss had thought that Sirius had liked it just as much as he had. And _God_, had Remus liked it. Fantasising about a guy and then finally kissing him was, well it was fucking great. The people in books who talked about violins and fireworks didn't know what they were on about.

When Remus had kissed Sirius it was just the two of them, forget the violins or fireworks, a rhino could have crashed into the room and Remus wouldn't have noticed. All Remus remembered was the feel of Sirius' lips and the taste of him. _His _Sirius Black, the jealous part of him added, trying to fend off the image of the girl that James had seen Sirius making out with when James had returned from the library.

When James had said knowingly that he didn't think they'd be seeing Padfoot until the morning, Remus had physically felt a pain in his chest.

_I'm such a loser, _he thought remembering with a sinking stomach the disgusted look Sirius had given him as he left,_ he can barely stand me now. _

* * *

'Mmmm,' Sirius sighed as he ran his hands under Vanessa's top. 

Ten minutes later and the 'small' kiss hadn't turned out to be small. Neither of them had really been expecting it to. One small gentlemanly peck on the cheek had quickly been followed by a second, in Sirius' opinion much more satisfactory, kiss. The third had found them on the sofa, making out.

Sirius kissed Vanessa harder, almost biting her in his frenzy to forget what had happened earlier. She in turn met fire with fire and with a little moan of lust tried to take off his shirt. Sirius helped her eagerly. This was how it was meant to be, he thought, slightly reassured. This was comfortable and right. Not that he had anything against homosexuals, it's just _he _wasn't one of them, _he _liked girls.

Deepening his kisses, he tried to convince himself that what had happened with Remus had just been an experiment, a disastrous experiment, but somehow he couldn't seem to let it go.

Sirius felt uncomfortable just remembering the way it had felt, but that didn't seem to stop him from seeing Remus in his mind, his tawny eyes staring at Sirius in disapproval. Sirius shook his head to clear the image but Remus seemed to fill his senses until….

'Sirius,' Vanessa was looking up at him concerned.

'Sorry, what?' Sirius asked confused.

Vanessa laughed. 'You stopped kissing me. Are you tired?' she teased him sweetly. 'Need a time out?'

Sirius looked up at her and smiled, ready to continue, when he did a double take and for the first time really looked at the girl he'd spent the last four hours with. She had blue, pale, watery eyes and a slightly turned up nose that gave her a pert look. She was good looking he knew that, but he didn't feel in the least bit attracted to her and all of a sudden he wished that he was anywhere other than making out with this pretty blonde. Feeling as though he'd just woken up from a dream, he was disgusted. What the hell was he trying to do? Sharply he pulled away and sat up, breathing heavily. Vanessa's smile faltered, 'Sirius, what's wrong?' Sirius shook his head, unable to answer. 


End file.
